This is not easy for me to do this but i felt like I have to. I feel like you deserve the explanation that I decided to cut you out of my life, possibly for good. You are good person with big heart for the community and a good parent as well. This time, I feel a lot of mixed emotions toward you because I thought you are one of my close friends to the point where I can feel like I can tell you everything but you decided differently. This is disappointment, a huge one. And this is going nowhere and I feel like I can't even talk to you in person right now, not ever. I do hope that you will understand when I say things like this. Someday you will see it for yourself with another person that reminds you of me.
Sighs, I couldn't believe that you would do this to me. You betrayed me big time and I couldn't describe how I am feeling right now when I write this to you. Right now, I feel like I have many thinking of what I want to say to you but I have to keep it simple and sweet farewell. When I expressed the feelings to you, I expect you to keep it to yourself, not sharing with other people.
ID: A background with tan, white, dark purple and black mixed into the white spread out. Words: "The Truth is that the universe has been answering you all of your life, but you cannot receive the answers unless you are awake."--Rhonda Byrn.
I was shocked when it came from you and I couldn't believe it When a person express something out, I always believe it ALWAYS should stay in between two people because it means I trusted you with my feelings, secrets, and everything else. Hell, I kept all of your secrets and you decided to blabbed out one of them? This is not YOU, at all. I despised who you are right now because you are not someone that I know and loved, at least used to be.
You know what, I actually feel much better knowing that you don't need me anymore because you have your sweetheart and you have your own family to manage. I believe that everyone has their type of friendship, or different type of relationship that you have with person. I guess that you and I are not working out so well because I defended you in the past and now I can pretty much letting the words go throughout my ears. So thank to you, I lost my trust toward people again, I would have to work my ass off to start all over again. I am fortuntely lucky enough to have friends circle being smaller and now it's getting smallest. That means, I chose good friends that I can depend on and count on. You are not one of them anymore.
For your information, losing weight is something that I am most happy with because I finally get to lose weight, maintain healthy, and everything else before I turn 30 next year. This is one of my biggest goals that I can finally check off from the list. When you mentioned that in negative way, it's completely turn me off guard and I couldn't believe that you would do something like this. For past two weeks, my emotions, my thinking, and my mentally drained me out and I feel like I am going into depression again. I haven't see my counselor for more than two weeks, more of flaking it away. Yes, it's because of YOU. Now I am thinking that my losing weight is something that's self boost up and gain my confidence, if you can't take it, keep the words to yourself. Quit being jealous, quit being so negative person, quit complaining. START focus on yourself, your family, your relationship because I don't care about you anymore. Yes, I was so pissed off that I had to start my thinking all over again. I am sorry if my words are being too harsh to you but they are my raw feelings for you to make you understand the perspective of my side.
The only irony part about this is that you and I have depression, anxiety, and sometimes paranoid, that's only way i have to blunt out to you because honestly, i don't understand why you would do this to me and what did I ever do to you? I haven't anything bad but being successful on my weight loss journey, my work, and totally lucky that I have good friends to back me up and being so supportive. If that's something that you can't handle, too bad or at least learn how to work on that.
ID: A gray background with words: "it's not the goodbye that hurts. It's the flashbacks that follow."
One thing to keep that in mind, I do forgive you because that's who I am, but I won't forget what you did. I ALWAYS love you no matter what happens between us but it's better off this way, going on with your own life without being me in it. We will bump into community these days, for now....good luck with everything else.
ID: A black background with words: "You've got to take the food with the sad, love what you've got and remember what you had. Always forgive, but never forget. Learn from mistakes, but never regret."
Much love,
Samantha
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